Guess My Religion | Lineup | Cut

Guess My Religion | Lineup | Cut

#Guess #Religion #Lineup #Cut

– Do you drink wine? – I do not. – Do you drink coffee? – I do not. – That’s crazy ’cause guess what Mormons also don’t. Hmm, getting warmer. – Hi, my name’s Isla Gizon. – You can call me Pastor Abe. I’m a traveling speaker. Evangelist, I just talk to people. – [Interviewer] About? – Jesus. – [Interviewer] Are you religious? – I’m a seminary drop out. I actually was a youth pastor for a handful of years.

My old Pastor stole a bunch of money from me, it’s a long story. – [Interviewer] Today you’re gonna be guessing which religion everybody is. – Oh, this is gonna be easy. – ‘Course I picked the sluttiest outfit that I – [Interviewer] Everybody, walk on out there. – This is gonna be offensive. – [Interviewer] At your highest point, how religious were you? – Oh, I went through exorcisms, I cried after sex. Edit that part out. Edit it out. – Dude, your so hairy bro. – Blue Flamingo Members Lounge. Okay, sounds like a strip club. – I’m like juggling between Jewish and Muslim. – Why, what makes you say that? – I’m guessing you’re of, maybe perhaps, Middle Eastern, – Yeah. descent, yeah? – Yeah. – Oh my God, that’s super offensive. – No, you’re fine. – Okay. – You’re like Muslim, Islamic, right? – Why do you say that?

– ‘Cause of where your from. – Where am I from? – The Middle East, bro. You’re like hairy. – You’re kinda hairy too. – Yeah. – Skinny jeans, hip, strip club. So I think, atheist. – [Interviewer] Alright, next. – I’ll take that. – Thank you. – Okay. – Hi – Hi – Are you Jewish? – Why do you think I’m Jewish? – I’m starting to think that I think that everyone looks Jewish. This is bad you guys. I’ve been binge watching The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel. – Like your sense of style, very covered up though.

The only part of your skin I see is your face. – Evangelical. – Say John three sixteen. – Oh God, – Boom! I got, I know exactly what she is now. You’re Jewish. Say, I don’t know anything in Jewish lish. – L’chaim – Oh, my gosh, this guy’s a Jew. I mean, that sounded bad. That sounded bad. I’m about to get in trouble for this. – Oo, Oo. – Thank you. – What brand are they? – I’ve no idea. – You don’t believe in brands. Fascinating. – What? – You don’t believe in brands. Which is kinda like not believing in holidays. Which kinda sounds like you’re a Jehovah Witness. – What is your name? – Shiraz – Okay, so wine, you’re Italian. And Italians are predominantly Christian. Hot now! – Oh man. What’s your ethnicity? – I’m Israeli. – Is there any foods you can’t eat? – Well I eat everything but in my religion we can’t eat pork. – Are you kidding me? – Wait. – How many religions can’t eat pork other then the one that I know?

– It’s okay. – Jewish, everyone seems Jewish. – Okay, mm hmm yeah, the tattoo looks tribal. – You look, like Indian. She’s Hindu. – Is it ’cause I’m brown? – Yeah, it is, a little bit. – But you’re brown too. – It looks like a Pacific Islander tattoo. So I would say Mormon. A lot of Samoans are Mormons.

– How’s it? – Your Hawaiian bro. – I was born in Hawaii. – Knew it, I knew it. – My mother’s in Brooklyn. – So you’ve got some Puerto Rican, your Catholic. Got it! You just gave it away bro. – Nice button up shirt. I feel like you just took off your clergy collar. – Can you sing me your favorite hymn? – ♪ They shall live at His command ♪ – You’re a Jehovah’s Witness. – You’re a Father. You’re a Catholic Priest. Motherfucker. – Oh my God. – Are you Asian? – I get that a lot but no, I’m Hispanic. – Oh, Catholic. – ‘Cause I’m Hispanic I’m Catholic? – One thousand percent. – Water proof shoes, that means you’re on the road a lot. Walking a lot, traveling, doing important stuff for the Lord. – Can you sing for me too? – ♪ I see my mother kneeling with her family each day ♪

– That sounded a lot like my cousin’s like when I would attend Mormon church. – Do you drink wine? – I do not. – Do you drink coffee? – I do not. – Does your church have a basketball court? – Yes. – Ah ha! I got it! – You’re Mormon. – She’s Mormon.

– Catholic. I got that one. Right on the money bro. – I love your head scarf. I don’t necessarily think that makes you Muslim. – Where are you from? – Ghana. – There’s a lot of missionary trips that goes out to Ghana. I’m a have to go with Christian.

– Amish, they wrap their heads too. Black Amish curve ball. – [Interviewer] How do you think you did? – Terribly. – I think I only really got the Catholic Priest right. – I think I got this guy for sure, for sure. The hairiness, I can’t get over it. – [Interviewer] Raise your hand if he got you right. – Shut the front door. One, two, three, four. – Oh! Wow, I did so much better than I thought. – Wow. Strip club man. – Alright. So I’m actually Muslim. – Oh, Okay. – I just couldn’t get over the hairiness bro. – It’s just, I feel like I’m a bad representation for Muslims.

– No, no you’re perfect bro. – Let’s say if I was of Asian descent. – Are there a lot of Chinese Muslims? – Yeah, there’s like a whole city dedicated to Chinese Muslims. – I did not know that. – Yeah. – I’m Jewish. – Oh, okay. – What gave it away?

– I don’t know dude, I’m telling you, I thought everyone was Jewish at first. – Were actually reformed Jews, specifically. – What does that mean? – Judaism is a very strict religion like they don’t want men and women to be in the same temples and reformed Jews disagree with that completely. – What stereotype do you hate the most about Jewish people?

– People will assume that I’m really stingy with money. – Yeah I’ve heard that. – Yeah. – Not heard that you’re stingy with money. I heard that stereotype and it’s fucked up. – Oo, I got you wrong didn’t I? – Yeah, you called me Italian or something. I’m from Israel. – Oh! I would never have guessed that. – I’m not Jewish. – I knew that. – What is your religion? – I’m Druze. – Druze, oh interesting. What is that? – So we come from the Middle East. – What about here in America? How many Druze do you have?

– I don’t meet any Druze here. – Oh. – We have like five main prophets that we believe in. – Who are the five? – I can’t say out loud. It’d be too offensive. – Oh. – We’re not allowed to say their names out loud. – Do you have to marry a Druze?

– Yes. – So if you brought home like a Korean, Black, Druze man – I would be kicked out from my village. – Sorry Mom. – Hello. – Hi, so I’m Hindu. – Okay, but that’s not a Hindu tattoo, right? – No this is Fijian. I’m Fijian. – Oh. – Yeah. There’s a lot of Hindu Fijians. – Wow. – So basically the British stole my great, great, great, great, great, grandpa and took him to Fiji.

– From India. – That happened, yeah from India. – Those Brits man. – Father. – I’m actually one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. – Oh, I knew there was one of you here. – Jehovah’s Witness. – Yes. – Oh! – No that was really, ’cause I thought legit, yeah she’s not gonna guess I’m JW. Oh, what? – Correct me if I’m wrong, but you guys don’t even celebrate your birthdays, right? – Yeah, we don’t. – So you’ve never a birthday party? – No. – Have you ever knocked my door? – No. – If you did I would answer it. – Okay, I appreciate that. – Next. – So I’m not Catholic. – Oh, what are you then? – I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Ladder Day Saints. – Oh. – Have you heard of them? – Yeah, yeah Mormons right? – Yeah, but we don’t go by Mormons. Yeah, ’cause we don’t wanna take Christ’s name

Out of the Church. – Does that mean a Mormon doesn’t call themselves a Mormon? – Not anymore, they advise us to correct that now. – Oh, who’s they? – Our prophet. – Who’s your prophet? – President Nelson – Oh, he’s like the Pope of the Mormon Church.

– Yeah, we have a Ladder Day Prophet. – Oh, yeah that’s what I meant, that’s what I meant. – Yes. – Ladder Day, my bad. – Why do everybody think Mormons have many wives? – Well back in the day, I guess, there wasn’t husbands because of the wars and stuff.

– So it was just based on the fact that there was a shortage of men? – Yes. – There’s a lot of talk about the Mormon underwear. – Oh garment. – Is that a true thing that you guys never take off? – Okay so, – That’s a weird thing.

I feel bad for asking. – It’s sacred garments to remind us of the covenants we make in the temple. – But you can never take that sucker off? – We don’t have to shower in it or anything. – You stick a middle finger before? – Yes, I have.

– Can we stick it together? Oh! Oh ho! Bad Mormon. – Oh, I got you right. I know I got you right. I know I got, Christian right? – Yeah. – Boom. We just have that telepathy going. – What type of Christian? – So my parents grew up Methodist, so I’m Methodist. – I grew up Methodist. – Oh really? – With the flame on the side of the cross. – Uh huh, yes, yes.

– Do you usually wear a head wrap? – I’m wearing it ’cause it’s cold outside. – Oh. – So. – So is there a difference between Christianity here versus Christianity there? – Yeah, so for me I grew up here but my family is originally from Ghana so they’re a lot more strict

On what they believe and certain things. Like pre marital sex, same sex marriages, all of that stuff. Like I would say I’m more open to like certain ideas than they would be. – Well, thank you. – Yeah, no problem. – Fellow United Methodist. – Yes. – I’ve got a lot of student debt

From my Methodist upbringing. – I kinda did good. – [Interviewer] How’d that go for you? – I feel bad ’cause I said a lot of stuff that I feel like I’m a get in trouble for. – [Interviewer] Did you learn anything new? – Druze, is that how you say it? – Yeah, Druze. – Yeah, I learned that exists. – I feel very blessed

And I’m gonna probably go to heaven now. – [Interviewer] Raise your hands. Is he going to heaven? – [Interviewer] Well good job. – Thanks everyone.

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